Today I managed to catch up on some paperwork, pay bills and sweep the kitchen floor. The list of things that needed to be done was much, much longer. I’m focusing on what I what I did get done, however, and being grateful. Yay, me!!
This self cheer has been a long time coming – requiring release, honest self-evaluation with some self recrimination, acceptance, forgiveness, prayer… and claiming my JOY (my 2026 Journey of Oneing and Yielding – see Jan. 5 post). I’ve had to do a major mental makeover the last couple of years!
Caregiving for my beloved Doug has become my full-time job. I used to spend my time being extremely (overly, perhaps?) productive – doing so many things personally and professionally as a single mom of three for over 20 years, rearing three absolutely fabulous kids, working two and sometimes three jobs, holding various RN positions with a lot of responsibility, developing wellness programs, overseeing the school health program at Denton ISD, collaborating with many wonderful school and district administrators and campus RNs who were exceptional, developing our district’s safety plan as their first emergency planner, and working within our community to foster working relationships among many city and county agencies, ensuring smooth communications with all when emergencies arose – health and otherwise. I was instrumental in the organization of two emergency response/advisory councils, and served on multiple boards across Denton and Denton County, receiving a number of accolades and honors along the way. I was very active in church activities at Immaculate Conception Catholic Church, serving in many different roles for over 30 years, developing life-long friends whose connections I treasure to this minute. I share these things not in a bragging way, although I am proud of my work in service to others, but as a measurement of comparison. Go back and read the first sentence of this post!
Now, as my beloved Doug’s caregiver, I spend the majority of my time making sure he feels safe, loved, and comfortable. I’ve always been deeply spiritual, and am still able to participate in our Unity Church of Arlington activities in a variety of leadership roles, which grounds me and Doug both. I am so blessed to continue to have wonderful friends and a family whose love and support I couldn’t do without. I write these blogs for my mental health. Yay, me!
My patron saint, St. Thérèse of Lisieux (1873–1897 ) was also known as the “Little Flower.” She espoused a life of service she called “The Little Way,” a spiritual path of doing ordinary daily tasks and duties with extraordinary love, trust and childlike surrender to God rather than seeking grand or heroic deeds. Her example, at its core, has become my choice as well. That philosophy is serving me well right now, as I’ve needed to yield my need to do, to be, to serve in multiple capacities all the time to many people, to living a much simpler (and still exhausting sometimes) life.
In my “little ways,” I know I am making a difference, and it has boosted my mental health to accept that. I don’t live in the land of “used to” anymore, but in the land of dementia caregiving, in my home of enjoying the good, being grateful for the small ways of my life, and being love in action. These are my blessings. Yay, me!!
Thanks for joining me on this JOYful trip!